As you know, I like to inflict the artistic endeavors of my childhood on my Bear o’ Honey (and you, dear readers!). This week I present to you Big Magic!, a fairy tale I wrote in second grade during Enchanted Castle Week, which, let’s be honest,… Read More »Big Magic!: A Fairy Tale for the Ages
[Featuring GIFs from Are You Afraid of the Dark?] At some point in life, I turned into a ‘fraidy cat. My husband—a horror/monster movie aficionado—suggests spooky H’weenish things for us to do, but they all seem too scary. Maybe after experiencing panic attacks throughout 2015, I… Read More »SWING SCARE: A Ghost Story to Chill Your Bones
Our meander down the weedy path that some call Mem’ry Lane continues with Part 4 of Pre-HappiMess Era art (a.k.a, late ’80s to early ’90s). Do enjoy these whimsical visuals born in a child’s mind, won’t you? And if you suspect you’re in for more mermaids,… Read More »The Humble Beginnings of HappiMess -OR- The Little Kid Art Gallery: Part 4
The warmest of greetings to you all! Get yourself a nice cup of tea or booze and join us for another nostalgic installment of Pre-HappiMess Era art circa late ’80s/early ’90s. View the illustrated imagination of a young Stef! Be sure to check out or… Read More »The Humble Beginnings of HappiMess -OR- The Little Kid Art Gallery: Part 3
Ivey and I once had entry-level-ish jobs that enabled us to email each other multiple times, and not just quick sentences, ether. No, these emails would contain at least five paragraphs full of great detail, as if we hadn’t written each other in months, when… Read More »Foxy Academy -OR- God’s Gift to Women
Once the initial stretch of forest ends in Imagination Land, the path splits. To the direct left, the path teases the edge of the forest and makes it way back to the coast. The northwest path leads into the mountains, and to the right of that is a heavy curtain of leaves hiding a inky-black pond that turns into an acid-trip of a tributary, which I realize makes no sense at all at this point, but that explanation shall come another day.
Beyond the pond and on the other side of the tributary lies the jungle. Usually it’s dark when I tromp through it, but let’s add a bit of daylight to see what’s around…
Sixth grade was a time of real inspiration for me. I wanted to get into some real-life Wayside School is Falling Down-type adventures. I did my best to create them, as evidenced by the fantastical Wayside-esque novel my twelve-year-old self wrote, incorporating real-life friends and classmates in… Read More »The Sixth Grade Scrapbook
Today we return to Imagination Land, the imaginary world of incredible landscapes I think of before I fall asleep. When I close my eyes, I always picture myself in the same spot: lying in the tall grass on some bluffs, overlooking the ocean. Sometimes the sun is… Read More »Imagination Land: The Forest: Part 1
Once upon a time, my husband asked what bedtime stories I would read to our hypothetical kid. This conversation somehow led to me tucking him and his teddy (i.e., our dog, Max) into bed. Then I read him stories and journal entries I wrote when… Read More »My Second-Grade Journal (1992)
After I was unceremoniously dumped during my first semester of freshman year, I acted out a bit. I also, with the help of Esquire and Tetra, invented a game! The rules even had different sections established by Roman numerals—that’s how you know shit’s for real.
We’ve only ever played Bikini Snow Tag once, and I’m not proud to say I was on the team that cheated. That ain’t right! Do look past the dubious integrity of a heartbroken nineteen-year-old and give the game a try yourself. The rules are below—grab some bikinis and get going!